The Captain isn’t messing around. He came in, took over my toy collection, and earned a few new titles along the way. It’s the largest toy in my collection so far, barely beating out my Papaya Candy Stick. It’s the most realistic looking dildo I own, a title previously held by my Tantus Hank. It’s also the softest dildo I own, softer than my Tantus Flurry. The Captain isn’t something I would have normally picked out, seeing as I usually steer clear of realistic dildos, but I took a chance and I’m glad I did.
Okay, I have a confession. I’ve been masturbating for as long as I can remember. I’ve been using sex toys for the past 5 years. Over two of those years I’ve been reviewing toys. Part of that time was even spent selling sex toys. And I still don’t know if I’ve found my G-spot. I’m sure it’s in there but...where? Sure, there are spots that feel better than others but I’m not certain that it’s THE spot. I’ve tried everything. Different positions, different toys, different stimulation, different times in my cycle, but alas, I haven’t ever been sure that I was hitting it. I hoped that the Bullseye would do the trick but I was still cautiously optimistic.
I’ve talked about it before but I try not to dwell on it. I have a chronic pain condition that limits me when it comes to my sex life. Thankfully, I have a supportive partner who understands. Before I introduced Liberator into my bedroom, I was limited with the amount of positions I could get myself into and the length of time could hold them. Before Liberator, we were pretty much left with just missionary position for the duration of sex and even that started to take its toll on my hips and lower back. While I love each piece I own and they have all been helpful, my absolute favorite piece is my Liberator Flip Ramp. The Flip Ramp is like the Ramp/Wedge’s cool little sister that no one really knows about. Everyone wants the Ramp/Wedge combo, not even bothering to research the full line of furniture from Liberator. Sure, the Ramp/Wedge is versatile and has its place but the Flip Ramp is definitely worthy of some attention.
Spanking has always been an interest of mine but I haven't acted on it too much. I bought a few small, low quality paddles that didn't do more than turn my ass a light shade of pink. When Tantus announced their line of all silicone paddles, I wanted to get my hands on one but I was too scared to take the plunge (pun intended). They looked amazing but much more intense than my little wimpy cardboard-esque paddles. I lusted after the Thwack and the Pelt for quite a while but never quite got the nerve to order either one. After the release of the initial four paddles, Tantus released a fifth all-silicone paddle that could serve multiple purposes. They crafted a paddle with a striking surface shaped like the Thwack with a handle shaped like a G-spot dildo. When I received it for a review, I was ecstatic.
I’m generally a fan of pinpoint stimulation. Broad heads just stimulate too wide of an area and I can’t focus on the sensations in the location I want them. This is the main reason I don’t own many wands. My first wand was the Couture Inspire, which has a much smaller head than any other wand. It also offers attachments that can pinpoint stimulation. My second wand was the Wahl 2-Speed, which also offers different attachments, one of which is perfect for pinpoint stimulation. These two options, while powerful and pinpoint, still weren’t perfect for me. Both still required their power cord and the Wahl isn’t made of the greatest materials. I was still searching for powerful wand that was still made of high quality materials and hopefully waterproof. Enter the Shibari Halo.
For years, I’ve preferred to keep the amount of nasty chemicals in my body products to a minimum. I haven’t always succeeded, but I try. However, lubricants are one item I’m pretty picky about. Since the genitals are made up of fairly sensitive skin and mucous membranes, I always strive to eliminate parabens, phthalates, preservatives, and glycerin from my arsenal of sex toys and lubricants. What have I learned in my quest for the perfect lube? Finding a good, clean water-based lubricant can be tough. Sure, silicone-based lubricants are easy. All they requires is dimethicone, dimethiconol, and/or cyclopentasiloxane. But water-based…When I heard about Coconu lubricants, I was anxious to give it a shot. Their oil-based lubricant is a USDA certified organic lubricant. Water-based lubricants aren’t certified by the USDA because they’re not considered food-safe or made from food-quality ingredients. I’m unable to use oil-based lubricant at the moment so I jumped at the chance to review their water-based lubricant, hoping the water-based would share the same quality of ingredients boasted about in their oil-based. I’ve been searching for my holy grail water-based lubricant, but right now my go-to’s have been Sliquid Sassy and Pjur Nude.
The folks over at Tantus have got to be mind-readers because if there is one Tantus dildo I had been lusting over, it was the Tsunami. When I was sent my first item to review and it turned out to be the Tsunami, I was ecstatic. I’m a huge fan of texture and the Tsunami looked perfect. Those purple ridges and waves just called to me. The length looked perfect. It even had a G-spot curve. Most of my dildos are straight thrusting dildos so I was searching for a good G-spot dildo. This was meant to be. After all, how could you possibly go wrong with Tantus silicone anyways?
The Jimmyjane Hello Touch has been praised as a revolutionary, game changing sex toy that “may be the best...ever”. According to Shape’s review, the Hello Touch will give your man “superpowers” instead of intimidating him like other toys. It’s been hailed as an “intuitive” vibrator, serving to enhance the use of fingers during masturbation, foreplay, and sex. From the mainstream praise this toy was receiving, it was clear to me that it was being marketed to a totally different audience than your average, run-of-the-mill sex toy reviewer. You wouldn’t find the We-Vibe Tango/Salsa or the Pure Wand receiving this much popular praise, despite the high status they hold among reviewers.